Milton Caniff.

All I wanted was a slice, is that too much to ask?

I got off the R train at Union street in Brooklyn and walked up to Fifth avenue. But the pizza shop on the corner–Fifth Avenue Pizza–was closed. So I turned left, in the direction of Flatbush avenue. Four-and-a-half blocks later I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t passed a Pizzeria. On a commercial street chock full of restaurants no less. 

I didn’t want to keep moving away from Union street, where I was eventually headed, so I doubled-back, crossed over Union Street and continued on, figuring, again, a pizzeria would be a stone’s throw away.

Nope. Nada. Bubkus. I was apoplectic, hating hipster Brooklyn like never before, when I finally found a spot, on 3rd Street just off Fifth Avenue called Villa Rustica. I went in and ordered a couple of slices and sat down to eat.

Now, unless I’m at a fancy pizza shop, one of those places that claims to be “the best,” I’m not overly picky. What I’m looking for is a representative slice. Something I could offer an out-of-towner as an example of a good New York City slice. (Talk about a new spin on VORP–value above replacement pizza!) Well, the slice at Villa Rustica was just that–and better than any of the local pizza I have around my way in the Bronx.

It wasn’t spectacular, didn’t re-invent the wheel, but it was satisfying and delicious and it made my anger go away.

Ah, the restorative powers of a good, representative, New York City slice.

[photo credit: akuban]

As I mentioned earlier, Emma Span’s first book was released yesterday. Here at the Banter we are bursting with pride at Emma’s accomplishment, because she’s one of us, and also because she’s simply one of the best writers to emerge from the blogosphere, a truly original voice. Smart and funny. I think the world of her, as a writer and as a friend–and yes, she’ll be back to blogging here in the very near future.

So join us in giving her props and don’t sleep–go pick up a copy of her memoir.

Ya hoid?

Over at the Pinstriped Bible, our pal Steve Goldman has a couple of posts on the prospect of Robinson Cano batting fifth:

Cano’s batting average ranked sixth in the league. His True Average (formerly Equivalent Average) of .293, which measures the sum total of his contributions on offense on a scale identical to batting average, ranked only 29th among players with 400 or more plate appearances. Among those finishing ahead of him: Jorge Posada (.301) and Nick Swisher (.300). You really don’t need the statistics to appreciate the basic reality of this: Posada and Swisher simply reached base more often. Unless Cano hits .350 this year or learns to take a walk, both spectacularly unlikely, and assuming business as usual on the part of either player, they are going to reach base more often this season.

Given the purpose of the batting order is to promote offensive production, what purpose is served here? Over the course of his career, Posada has been the superior hitter with men on, and his career OBP stands at .379. Like Cano, Swisher struggled to deliver baserunners to the plate, but still reached base 40 percent of the time in those situations. His strikeouts, viewed as an annoyance by the less sophisticated fan, meant he hit into a double play in only 11 percent of opportunities vs. 17 percent for Cano. Posada, despite his typical aged catcher legs, hit into a twin killing in only 14 percent of his opportunities.

We also haven’t considered another possibility, which is that not only does Cano not hit .350, he doesn’t hit .320 again either, instead falling back to his career averages of .306/.339/.480. Were he to do that, his OBP would barely escape the league average.

A soul classic (love the intro):

Last night, I went to a book release party at a bar in Park Slope, Brooklyn, for our own Emma Span’s memoir, 90% of the Game Is Half Mental: And Other Tales from the Edge of Baseball Fandom, which was officially released yesterday (more on that to follow). I was talking with Diane Firstman, Jay Jaffe and Ben Kabak when a petite brunette with a firm handshake introduced herself to us.

“I’m Mara,” she said, “I used to work with Emma at the Voice. I wrote a book last year.”

And how do you do?

Me: What was your book about?

Mara: Orgasms.

Diane: Was it illustrated?

I immediately thought about the MOMA cocktail party scene from Manhattan (1:40 into this clip):

Me: Really, what about orgasms, exactly?

Mara: It was about my search to have one.

Me: Okay, so without ruining anything, did you have one?

Mara: I did.

Me: That’s great. I love a happy ending.

Jay: What, did you guys rehearse this on the way over?

We did not. But it felt scripted. We laughed and enjoyed a true New York moment.

A.J. Burnett and Mariano Rivera, the latter in his spring debut, put a lot of runners on base against a pathetic split-squad Astros lineup, but only let one score. The preliminary Opening Day lineup plated three early runs, and Phil Hughes wrapped things up with four scoreless innings as the Yankees won 4-1.

Lineup:

R – Derek Jeter (SS)
L – Nick Johnson (DH)
S – Mark Teixeira (1B)
R – Alex Rodriguez (3B)
L – Robinson Cano (2B)
S – Jorge Posada (C)
L – Curtis Granderson (LF)
S – Nick Swisher (RF)
L – Brett Gardner (CF)

Subs: Jorge Vazquez (1B), Reegie Corona (2B), Eduardo Nuñez (SS), Brandon Laird (3B), Jesus Montero (C), Jamie Hoffmann (RF), Greg Golson (CF), Colin Curtis (LF), Austin Romine (DH)

Pitchers (IP): A.J. Burnett (2 1/3), Zach Segovia (1 2/3), Mariano Rivera (1), Phil Hughes (4)

Big Hits: A solo homer by Mark Teixeira (1-for-2, HBP). Doubles by Nick Swisher and Robinson Cano (both 1-for-3). Jorge Posada went 2-for-3 and is now hitting .421 on the spring.

Who Pitched Well: Zach Segovia retired all five men he faced, striking out two and picking up the win. Phil Hughes threw four scoreless innings allowing just three singles and a walk needing just 59 pitches, all while continuing to experiment with his changeup. At the same time, he was often working from behind in the count and faced the subs of the road split-squad of a terrible Astros team and still only struck out two (both on curveballs).

Who Didn’t: A.J. Burnett walked four and allowed a double and a single in 2 1/3 innings, using up his 65 pitches well before the Yankees’ goal for him of four innings. Burnett said he was struggling with his fastball command and overthrowing. Mariano Rivera showed some rust in his first inning of work of the spring, walking one, giving up a pair of singles (one hard hit, one that didn’t reach the outfield), and throwing 27 pitches. Still, he stranded all three runners.

Nice Plays: Running catches by Nick Swisher and Colin Curtis in the outfield.

Oopsies: Jorge Posada airmailed a throw over second base, but the runner was advanced on ball four anyway and didn’t take third on the overthrow. Robison Cano failed to get a double-play ball out of his glove in time for Derek Jeter to make the pivot. Phil Hughes dropped a comebacker for an error.

Ouchies: Mark Teixeira was hit in the back with a pitch, but stayed in the game and later homered.

Other: Although the batting order was a trial run at the Opening Day lineup, Joe Girardi was clear that he’s still experimenting with where Curtis Granderson and Brett Gardner will play in the outfield, so don’t read anything into Granderson starting in left on Tuesday, even though I’m going to.

Props to the Star-Ledger‘s Marc Carig for providing some of the details via play-by-play on twitter as the game wasn’t on TV or radio in the New York area.

According to Chad Jennings, Mariano Rivera will make his spring debut tonight against the Astros.

More from the funny pages…

George Herriman.

Bon Scott sounded like he gargled whisky when he sang:

In Tropic Thunder, Ben Stiller played Tugg Speedman, an action movie star who once made a serious movie called Simple Jack:

It was a good gag, poking fun at movie stars who try to gain respectability–i.e., an Academy Award–by playing a mentally handicapped character.

It’s not exactly the same thing, but I couldn’t help but think about this bit when I read about Stiller’s new movie, Greenberg. Okay, he’s not playing a blind man, but it’s close–this is Stiller in an earnest, downbeat mode.

Stiller gets serious! The New Yorker gave him a good notice, though. I liked one of director Noah Baumbach’s early movies, The Squid and the Whale, so maybe it’s not all that bad.

Then again, maybe it is. Ever see Interiors? Manage to stay awake?

Picking up where we left off yesterday, yo, remember Ratner’s down on the L.E.S?

Dig this recent post from Vanishing New York, a most excellent blog.

Tim Marchman on which team has the most core talent:

Over a decade and a half, the constant in Yankee championships has been the home grown quartet of Derek Jeter, Andy Pettitte, Jorge Posada and Mariano Rivera: The Core Four, as the papers (among others) have it. From one angle, this is evidence of the strength of the Yankee Way; from another, it’s proof that the Yankee Way is a synonym for money. (Retaining the services of those four players has cost the team about a half billion dollars over the course of their careers.)

As the Yankees try to defend their World Series title, a striking bit of evidence for the second possibility is that despite their many virtues, it could be argued that none of the team’s Core Four are among their actual core four — i.e., their best four players — something having less to do with their still-considerable powers than with how strong the rest of the team is.

Just in time for St. Patty’s Day, dig this new novel by Steve Rushin, formerly of Sports Illustrated. Rushin is a talented and funny writer. I remember Jay Jaffe enthusiastically recommending Rushin’s Road Swing and I was not disappointed. He’s the goods. This novel looks like fun.  

Peep the website.

The Times ran a couple of literary baseball pieces of note over the weekend: one, on Mark Twain, the other, on Stephen Crane. And here, belatedly, is a fine story by Alan Schwarz that is worth reading:

Dorothy Jane Mills was supposed to feel honored last Monday when the Society for American Baseball Research included her husband, Dr. Harold Seymour, in the inaugural class of the organization’s new de facto Hall of Fame. She was supposed to feel thankful that her assistance with Seymour’s seminal three-volume history of baseball, published sequentially from 1960 through 1990, would be acknowledged during his induction.

But Mills felt neither honored nor thankful. Instead, resentment that had percolated within her for 50 years — over how she had, in fact, co-written those books but received no credit — boiled over into heated discussions of historical record, academic honesty and what can best be described as intellectual spousal abuse.

The controversy ended Wednesday with the organization, known as SABR (pronounced say-ber), telling Mills that she would be honored equally with Seymour. But only after she had relived a time in her life she can forgive even less than forget.

“Everyone assumed that he had done all that work by himself — that’s what he wanted them to assume, but we were equal partners,” said Mills, 81, working on her 26th book at her home in Naples, Fla. “All these things were done jointly. He just couldn’t share credit. And I didn’t say anything at the time, because at the time, wives just didn’t do that.”

Great job by Schwarz.

See you in the funny pages…

First, up: E.C. Segar.

Since we are talkin’ bout beverages…

Mmm, Mmm, Good.

The Yankees have now played a dozen exhibition games, more than a third of their spring schedule. So what have we learned thus far?

Over at LoHud, Chad Jennings reports that, in Tuesday’s game, Joe Girardi will start a preliminary Opening Day lineup that is likely to look like this:

R – Derek Jeter (SS)
L – Nick Johnson (DH)
S – Mark Teixeira (1B)
R – Alex Rodriguez (3B)
L – Robinson Cano (2B)
S – Jorge Posada (C)
L – Curtis Granderson (CF/LF)
S – Nick Swisher (RF)
L – Brett Gardner (LF/CF)

Nick Johnson hitting second is among the Yankees’ worst-kept secrets. It was obvious the day they signed him that he was brought in to replace Johnny Damon in the two-hole with ability to work deep counts and get on base. The pleasant surprise from Johnson this spring has been his team-leading three home runs (all of which have come against the Pirates). No other Yankee has more than one. Johnson also has a pair of doubles and is slugging 1.308  and leading the Yankees in most major offensive categories. That despite missing some time after tweaking his lower back when his spikes got caught in the turf rug the team uses to protect the batting circle during batting practice.

Robinson Cano hitting fifth is a direct challenge to Cano to improve his numbers with runners in scoring position. Last year he hit .207/.242/.332 with runners in scoring position, and Kevin Long, who keeps such stats on the Yankee hitters, said that Cano’s swings on pitches out of the zone spiked in those situations. Cano hit .376/.407/.609 in 343 at-bats with the bases empty last year, and one of his goals this spring has been to maintain the same approach with runners on.

I expected Curtis Granderson to be the fifth-place hitter, but with Cano fifth, Granderson seventh makes sense so as not to have lefties hitting back-to-back, particularly when one of them is as susceptible to left-handed pitching as Granderson.

Brett Gardner batting ninth seems to suggest that Gardner is well on his way toward winning a starting job, and to hear Girardi speak to the YES crew during Saturday’s home game, that does seem to be the case. That was the first spring game that featured Gardner in center field and Granderson in left field in the starting lineup, and Girardi said that he was just trying to figure out which arrangement (that or with Granderson in center and Gardner in left) allowed the two to work best together. That clearly implied that Gardner would be starting at one of those two positions.

Gardner has hit just .158 (3-for-19) this spring, two of those hits being bunt singles, and hasn’t stolen a base or delivered an extra-base hit, but he does have four walks and a .304 OBP. His three challengers all have even lower averages and have combined for just one-extra base hit, one walk, and no steals: Jamie Hoffmann .150 (3-for-19, 2B), Randy Winn .133 (2-for-15, BB), Marcus Thames .111 (2-for-18).

In the battle for the backup infielder spot, Kevin Russo has distinguished himself at the plate, hitting .385/.500/.538 (5-for-13, 2 2B, 3 BB) and has rotated through second, third and shortstop without a significant gaffe. I don’t know if he’ll be able to overcome the Yankees’ existing preference for Ramiro Peña, who has struggled at the plate save for an early homer but played outstanding defense, but Russo is certainly making a strong impression, showing a great approach in the plate, and making solid contact with regularity.

(more…)

(Yoooouuu, better) Watch your step, it’s March 15th…

I can’t imagine it’s ever too early for malt liquor.