It’s rainin’ in New York.

Will they get this one in?  And if they do, can A. Pettitte and Junior Weaver keep the ball in the park? 

Perish the thought.

And Let’s Go Yan-Kees!

Terminator!

Our man in the field Chyll Will brings it:

Wocka, wocka, wocka.

I can hear Will’s uncle Woodrow now, right out of a Cosby routine: “What’s wrong with that boy?”

We interrupt the baseball talk for a New York minute to appreciate the fantastic first round playoff series between the defending champion Boston Celtics and the Chicago Bulls. The series is tied at three games apiece. Four of those six games have gone to overtime. One game went to double overtime and last night, they played a triple OT.

We can only hope Game 7 tomorrow night is not a letdown.  No matter who prevails this has been riveting stuff.

Today’s news is powered by a little clip from one of the best “Simpsons” episodes ever:

• Things are going well for Nick Swisher:

The Yankees can’t help but be happy with what they’ve squeezed out of Swisher, who left the spring as a bench player but has stepped up in a big way.

“You wonder where our record would be without him,” Yankees manager Joe Girardi said. “He’s been extremely productive. He played some great defense [Wednesday], diving all over the place. We talked about wanting to have depth and that’s what he’s provided.”

Swisher heads into Thursday’s game against the Angels leading the Yankees in home runs (seven), RBIs (19) and runs scored (19), playing gritty outfield defense and even winning the fans over earlier in the month by volunteering to pitch an inning.

• PeteAbe has the recap of Alex Rodriguez’s appearance in an extended spring training intrasquad game.
• Speaking of Alex, the News has more juicy/gory details from Selena Roberts’ upcoming book on him.
• And speaking of books (I’m riding a “Segue” here . . . ), author Peter Golenbock Peter Golenbock spoke with Baseball Prospectus Radio about his biography of Boss George.
• And speaking of Baseball Prospectus (I’m still riding that “Segue”), Kevin Goldstein has some good news on uber-prospect Jesus Montero (originally published Wednesday):

Tuesday’s stats: 2-for-4, 2 HR (4), 2 R, 2 RBI
It’s rare for a 19-year-old to be able to dominate a High-A league (and a pitcher’s circuit at that), but Montero is doing just that, as last night’s onslaught brought his averages up to .371/.421/.614, which puts him in the league’s top ten in all three categories. The other good news is that reports on his defense are better, which unfortunately upgrades him from complete unacceptable to well below average, and as a 6-foot-4, 230 pound teenager, he’s not going to get any small (sic). First base is his likely destination in the end, but it’s not going to matter, because his bat is downright special.

[My take: Unless they plan on teaching him a corner OF position, it sounds like he’s trade bait in a couple of years.]

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I was a little nervous about heading to the new Stadium for the first time, especially after checking out Citi Field recently and finding it, while very nice, just unsettlingly different and odd and un-Mets-like. But I’ve got to say that while my bitterness at the new Stadium’s prices and medieval caste system (the good seats actually have a moat around them) and Hard Rock-ness and, really, its very existence remains undiminished… well, I liked it  better than I thought I would. Much more on that below.

Of course tonight’s taut, well-paced game helped a lot, as the Yankees beat the Angels 7-4 . The Angels struck first, the Yankees answered, the Angels took the lead again, the Yankees took it back, the Angels tied it up… A.J. Burnett looks like he’s been reading his How to Have an Off Night Without F*#^ing Imploding textbook. It took him a long time to find any kind of groove, but he “grinded it out” (to use Joe Girardi’s favorite vague post-game term), kept the game under control, and made it through seven innings.

The Yankees broke through in the eighth, off of Justin Speier, starting with a single that brought Robinson Cano’s hitting streak up to 17 games. Posada moved him over to third, and newly minted fan favorite Nick Swisher was intentionally walked – an understandable strategy that backfired when Melky Cabrera singled in the go-ahead run. Then Ramiro Pena of all people doubled, and it was 7-4 Yankees. Phil Coke and Mariano Rivera tied up the lose ends.

Many people have noticed that the crowds at the new place were too quiet, and I’ve sensed that from watching on TV too – but it got properly loud tonight, much to my relief. Not Red Sox loud, or playoff loud, but pretty damn loud, and when Jeter got a two-out single in the 4th to give the Yankees a lead, it was the same kind of thick, tangible wave of decibels I remember from so many games across the street. There were still plenty of empty $2500 $1250 seats, and it still hurts to see views like that going to waste, but it didn’t seem to make much of a dent in the cumulative enthusiasm.

(Side note: we’re now entering the stage of Derek Jeter’s career where he passes someone on one all-time franchise list or another basically every time he scratches his balls. Tonight he moved into #9 on the Yankee’s all-time RBI lists, and a few days ago, his 8,103rd at-bat moved him past Micky Mantle for a Yankee record. From now on, I think we can expect milestones of varying degrees of obscurity roughly once a week.)

Getting back to the Stadium: there are certainly flaws, and if you’re reading this you probably don’t need me to tell you what they are; I can’t put it much better than Alex did, when he compared it to being inside a pinball machine. Lots of random noises and flashing lights. The Mohegan Sun restaurant between the bleachers reminds me of the obelisk in 2001: A Space Odyssey. The Great Hall is too much, Vegas overkill, and that name sounds like something from Tolkein (one of the scenes you skipped because it was like 12 solid pages of someone singing in Elvish). The whole place is so big, and so heavily branded, that it feels a bit like a theme park – welcome to YankeeWorld™!

As others have noted, the screen in center field is a little overwhelming – talk about larger than life:

Something I loved from my childhood. Something that could never ever possibly destroy us... Mr. Stay Puft!

The player’s faces loom like those Easter Island heads.

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Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim

2008 Record: 100-62
2008 Pythagorean Record: 88-74

Manager: Mike Scioscia
General Manager: Tony Reagins

Home Ballpark (multi-year Park Factors): Angel Stadium (103/102)

Who’s Replaced Whom:

• Kendry Morales replaces Casey Kotchman and Mark Teixeira
• Bobby Abreu replaces Garret Anderson
• Brian Fuentes replaces Francisco Rodriguez
• Shane Loux, Anthony Ortega, and Matt Palmer are filling in for John Lackey, Ervin Santana, and Dustin Mosely (all on DL)
• Rafael Rodriguez and Fernando Rodriguez are filling in for Darren Oliver and Kevin Jepsen (both on DL)

25-man Roster:

1B – Kendry Morales (S)
2B – Howie Kendrick (R)
SS – Erick Aybar (S)
3B – Chone Figgins (S)
C – Mike Napoli (R)
RF – Gary Matthews Jr. (S)
CF – Torii Hunter (R)
LF – Bobby Abreu (L)
DH – Juan Rivera (R)

Bench:

R – Jeff Mathis (C)
S – Maicer Izturis (IF)
R – Robb Quinlan (3B/1B)
R – Brandon Wood (IF)

Rotation:

L – Joe Saunders
R – Shane Loux
R – Anthony Ortega
R – Jered Weaver
R – Matt Palmer

Bullpen:

L – Brian Fuentes
R – Jose Arredondo
R – Scot Shields
R – Justin Speier
R – Jason Bulger
R – Rafael Rodriguez
R – Fernando Rodriguez

15-day DL:

RF – Vladimir Guerrero (torn pectoral)
RHP – John Lackey (forearm tightness)
RHP – Ervin Santana (elbow strain)
RHP – Dustin Moseley (elbow tightness)
LHP – Darren Oliver (shoulder stiffness)
RHP – Kevin Jepsen (back spasms)

60-day DL:

RHP – Kelvim Escobar (shoulder inflammation)

Typical Lineup:

S – Chone Figgins (3B)
S – Gary Matthews Jr. (RF)
L – Bobby Abreu (LF)
R – Torii Hunter (CF)
S – Kendry Morales (1B)
R – Mike Napoli (C)
R – Juan Rivera (DH)
R – Howie Kendrick (2B)
S – Erick Aybar (SS)

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While we’re on the subject, imagine the stones it took to perform a stunt like this:

Buster. Now, there was a tough guy.

It was inevitable. The day has finally arrived. The first day of the rest of Moe Green’s life. Just about everyone in my house–wife, the older cat, Tashi–is relieved because Moseph has been a terror of late. Me? I’m sympathizing with the poor kid.

It was fun while it lasted, papi. This one is for you.

Last week, Steven Goldman was set to board a plane to St. Louis.  At the last minute, he could not bring himself to get on the flight.

I have boarded many planes, though it has never been something I enjoy doing. I used to be afraid of crashing, but except for a brief moment or two of involuntary alarm during takeoff, I no longer worry about that, and once the plane is in the air I always feel fine. My problem is that I have an anxiety disorder centered around claustrophobia. I get into any small space, like a small airplane, and my limbic system goes haywire. My heart rate shoots up. My chest tightens. The ironically named flight response is incredible.

The plane to St. Louis was quite small, not quite a puddle-jumper, but the next step up. The low ceiling scraped my head. My overly large frame barely fit in the seat. The way the aisle was blocked by incoming passengers made me feel as if there was no exit. I imagined what I would feel like when they closed the door. The thought was terrible. I did not panic… but realized I probably would if I stayed, and that even if I was able to tough out the three-hour ride to St. Louis, I might never be able to convince myself to board the plane back home. I had taken two Xanax, an anti-anxiety medication, an hour before boarding, because I have been dealing with this stupid, frustrating, annoying thing for eight years now, and I knew it was possible that I might feel this way. The pills did not help. I felt helpless.

…The frustrating thing is that I still feel like myself. I don’t feel afraid inside. Even when I was in the grips of the worst of the attacks, the rational me was still in here, trying to manage the situation. On the plane to St. Louis I was, at least mentally, completely calm. The physiological reaction was like an overlay, a computer virus that was attacking the mainframe. I wasn’t thinking, “Aaagh! Let me out of here!” I was thinking, “Okay, how do I deal with this? How do I overcome this feeling?” It was a measured weighing of pros and cons that led me, in this instance, to get off of the plane. It was the right decision, but I still felt immensely disappointed that I had not been able to push it away, to rise above.

Goldman sat at the gate and watched the plane roll away, “excoriating myself, filled with self-disgust.”

The self-disgust is what jumped off the screen at me as I read this honest and uncompromising account of what is like to have a clinical anxiety disorder.  (On a slightly related note, Joe Pos has the SI cover story this week on Zack Greinke, who has managed to come to grips with his social anxiety disorder.)  Frustration, anger, which Goldman felt too, that’s understandable, but self-disgust? That’s crazy talk. That’s being in love with your own masochism.

I should know.  I do it all of the time.  And curse myself for doing it!  Most of us, even those who do not suffer from a crippling chemical imbalance, not knowing what to do with frustration, turn our anger inward.  Of course these things are easier to see in others than in ourselves necessarily.  It’s easier for me to say, Steve, why are you beating yourself up?, instead of changing my own behavior.

But self-disgust seems entirely inappropriate here. Goldman was actually taking care of himself, he protected himself and so, no matter how upset or disappointed he may have been (and legitimately so), he deserved to give himself some credit for his actions. Even if he still yearns to overcome his illness, which is admirable.

And if he isn’t willing to give himself that credit, I will.

Let’s get to it:

• If the Blue Jays’ hot start has you worried, consider this point from Joe Sheehan:

Finally, there’s the schedule. You can’t hold this against the Jays, who are playing the hand they’ve been dealt, but they have benefited from a schedule that has thus far included none of their three AL East rivals, teams that may be the three best in the league. The Jays have played every team in the AL Central, as well as the A’s and Rangers in the West. They have illustrated a point I think every analyst would agree with: if you put the Jays in any other division, they would be at worst a contender, and often a favorite. The pessimism about their chances this year stems in no small part from their having to play perhaps the toughest schedule in baseball. They haven’t gotten into that yet, and in fact, they won’t see the Red Sox, Yankees, or Rays for another two weeks. They play every AL team other than the Mariners before seeing any of those three, and in fact, the Jays don’t play the Rays at all until June 29. (In a whack-job of a schedule, the Jays play just nine of their first 78 games against the big three, then get them 42 times in their next 71 contests.)

• PeteAbe does his usual wonderful job, this time playing out the “what ifs” of the starting rotation:

. . . let’s say that Wang comes back in early June and Hughes is 4-1, 2.85. What then?

You shake Phil’s hand, thank him for a job well done and send him back to Scranton until he is needed again.

Get this much straight: CC Sabathia, A.J. Burnett and Andy Pettitte are pitching every five days if they are healthy. That’s a given. There is not going to be a six-man rotation. Those guys are conditioned to pitch every five days and they’re getting a pile of money to do so.

Joba Chamberlain also needs to pitch. One good start by Hughes in April should not start the “We need Joba in the bullpen” nonsense.  . . .

Here is what some people can’t seem to understand: Joba threw 100 innings last season. He needs to throw 150-plus this season so that in 2010 he can throw 180-plus. Then he can throw 200-plus in 2011 and so on. This is a young man with a great arm, four pitches and the makeup to be an ace. The Yankees would be foolish not to give him every chance to be a starter.

If you send him back to the bullpen, you’re starting the process all over again and increasing the risk of injury by suddenly changing his role. Joba has a 2.43 ERA in 15 starts over the last two seasons. That is really, really, very, very good.

• Pete also has some details on an apparent injury to Ian Kennedy.  And an update:

Ian Kennedy was examined by a specialist in NYC today because of his numb middle finger.

He has a vasospasm that can be treated with medication. He will be evaluated again Monday and will not throw until after that follow-up.

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We say it numerous times every year–“I’ve never seen that before.”  It is one of the constant pleasures of following the game.  Well, last night offered one of those moments when, with one out in the bottom of the eighth inning, fans at Comerica Park stood up and calmly started leaving the park.  The equally calm Yankee announcer, Ken Singleton, explained what was happening.  None of the players left the field and soon we learned that a fire alarm had been pulled.  The fans returned to their seats and almost had something to show for it as the Tigers scored five runs in the ninth inning, including Curtis Granderson’s three-run home run against Mariano Rivera.

But it wasn’t enough and the Yankees won, 8-6.

Joba Chamberlain pitched his best game of the young season, working out of trouble in the third inning when he walked three batters, gave up a single and a sac fly while allowing just a single run.  Miguel Cabrera, the best hitter in the league, came up with the bases loaded and two out and he took some good swings.  The count went full and Chamberlain struck Cabrera out on a sharp-breaking curve ball, the first curve of the sequence.

Nick Swisher hit home runs from both sides of the plate, Hideki Matsui smacked a three-run double, Johnny Damon had a couple of hits, and Robinson Cano extended his hitting streak to 16. 

Until the ninth inning, when Jonathan Albaladejo struggled so badly that Rivera was called in, it was a breezy game.  Singleton and David Cone, teamed together for the entire series in the YES broadcast booth, were a pleasure–informative, jocular, funny and intelligent.  Cone’s improvement this year has been noticable, don’t you agree?

The Yankees got a manly effort from Phil Hughes last night.  Let’s see what young Mr. Chamberlain has got this evening.

The future is now.

Lookin’ for a thorough review of the food at Yankee Stadium?  Then dig this cool Boogie Down blog, How Fresh Eats.  Dude has the skinny–soup to nuts.

Part One and Part Two.

What about the beer at the two new parks?  Eric Asimov takes a look in today’s New York Times.

And just cause we’re talking about food, why not take a look at a Shake Shack burger?

With Mother’s Day fast approaching, I thought this would be an ideal time to remind anyone looking for a gift to consider my wife Emily’s photo note cards. 

Check out her site. 

Spring is a good thing.

Much has been written about the need for the Yanks to get off to a strong start in the highly-competitive AL East.

With last night’s win over the Tigers, the Bombers have a 10-10 record after their first 20 games.  Some would call that disappointing.  Some would call for Joe Girardi’s head on a platter.  Some would step back and say “given all they’ve been through, 10-10 is pretty decent.”  But perhaps a larger question is . . . do the first 20 games of a season make or break your chances for the playoffs?

To attempt to answer this, I’ve analyzed the performances of all 104 playoff teams in the wild card era from 1996-2008 (I excluded 1995 due to the shortened schedule).  I first looked at how those teams did in their first 20 games:

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Today’s news is powered by …. Post-its!:

EepyBird’s Sticky Note experiment from Eepybird on Vimeo.

• Christina Kahrl has some thoughts on the construction of the Yankees roster:

The Yankees are supposed to be a good team, but it might be a little hard to see that when, to replace the immortal Cody Ransom at third base, they’ve stopped to… Angel Berroa. Apparently innumerable other bipeds weren’t available, or had already sought other engagements to make themselves unavailable . . .

The alternative would be that this organization, the same proud organization that struggled to come up with a first baseman better than Miguel Cairo in 2007, learned nothing about the value of adequate replacements from that particular lineup atrocity, and was blowing another week of their season on some new A-Rod substitute at third base that almost no other team in the league might consider. Sure, when Alex Rodriguez returns next week, this might prove a minor matter, but blowing the last few roster spots—let alone lineup cards, not to mention forgoing a decision to simply try to stock their minor league affiliates with useful journeymen—has cost this team in the past, and costs them to this day. It’s as if Clay Bellinger wasn’t a happy accident, but a choice informed by what we hope must be an appallingly parochial and ideally uninfectious local sense of taste.

[My take: OUCH! (but she’s right) . . . for a $200+ million team, the Yankee teams of the last few years have been increasingly “bipolar” in terms of their roster construction.  “Stars and Scrubs” might work in Roto . . . but it doesn’t work in real life.]

• Hurricane Alex is now scheduled to hit NY a bit earlier:

Alex Rodriguez and the Yankees have moved up A-Rod’s target date and are now shooting for a return to the team sometime in the first week of May, sources say.

Rodriguez and the Yankees were originally calling May 15 the target date for his return, and that is still the publicly stated goal. However, Rodriguez’s progress has been so good, both he and the team are hopeful he can return more than a week earlier than first expected.

• Ken Rosenthal allays any “Joba (back) to the ‘pen” fears.
• The Bombers have sort of seen the error of their economic ways, and are reducing prices on some of their top tier seats.  Here are some of the reductions:

• Tickets in the first row of sections 15A, 15B, 24B and 25 will be reduced, from $2,500 to $1,250, per regular-season game.

• The first row of sections 11, 12, 13, 27B, 28 and 29 will drop, from $1,000 to $650, per regular-season game.

• All fans who purchased full-season, $2,500 Legends Suite seats in the first row of sections 16-24A will receive an equal number of complimentary Legends Suite seats in the first row of the same sections for each of the remaining regular-season games this season.

• Fans who purchased full-season, $1,250 Legends Suite seats will receive an equal number of complimentary Legends Suite seats in the same price category for 24 games during the season, as selected by the Yankees. . . .

In addition, the Yankees are adopting a program affecting a few hundred seats in Field Level sections 115-125.

From now on, fans purchasing on a full-season basis three full regular-season ticket plans priced at $325 in those sections will receive a fourth ticket free.

[My take: Wonder if the Mets will follow suit . . .]

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“Maybe I’ll get some sleep tonight. I haven’t been doing that much lately.” —Dave Eiland

Welcome back, Phil Hughes.

You wouldn’t know it by the 11-0 final, but last night’s game between the Yankees and Tigers was a pitchers’ duel. Phil Hughes and Edwin Jackson locked horns for six scoreless innings before the Yankees dropped a ten-spot on the Detroit bullpen in the seventh.

Credit the Yankee offense, particularly Robinson Cano, for running deep counts on Jackson all game. Jackson finished the sixth inning having thrown 117 pitches despite having allowed just five men to reach base. With Jackson spent and the game still scoreless entering the seventh, Jim Leyland called on rookie Ryan Perry, a second-year professional who topped out in High-A last year. Perry faced five batters and retired just one, that being Jose Molina, who bunted Nick Swisher (single) and Melky Cabrera (walk) up to set up another key pinch-hitting appearance for Jorge Posada. Posada, who didn’t start for the second straight day due to a sore hamstring, lifted a low fly to left field that Josh Anderson appeared to lose in the Comerica Park lights. The ball skipped past Anderson allowing the gimpy Posada to reach second and both runners to score. After another walk by Perry, Nate Robertson and Brandon Lyon combined to allow seven more Yankees to score. The final blow was a grand slam by Molina that made him the rare player to have a sac bunt and a grand slam in the same inning (it was last done by Sal Bando in 1975, coincidentally also in the seventh inning). The inning went on so long that Angel Berroa, who pinch-ran for Posada, came to bat and singled off Lyon after Molina’s salami. Nick Swisher, who scored twice in that inning and broke out of his slump with two hits and two walks, added the eleventh run with a solo homer off Juan Rincon in the top of the ninth.

The real story of the night, however, was Hughes, who worked six scoreless innings allowing just two hits and two walks while striking out six. Spotting his fastball, which was coming in around 93 miles per hour, and mixing in a deadly, low-70s curve, and his new high-80s cutter, Hughes picked up right where he left off from the eight strong innings he threw against A.J. Burnett and the Blue Jays late last September. With his hair a bit bushier, faint sideburns, and what appeared to be a generally fuller build, Hughes looked and pitched like a more mature pitcher than the one we saw last year despite his still-tender age of 22.

Hughes received no favors from home plate umpire Derryl Cousins, who called several curves that dropped into the strike zone and a couple of fastballs right on the lower right-hand corner balls (included in the latter was ball four of one of Hughes’ two walks), yet he didn’t lose his cool or his confidence. He got into one jam, that coming in the fourth inning. With one out, he hit Miguel Cabrera in the hand. Carlos Guillen then singled and both runners moved up on a groundout. Hughes pitched around the hot-hitting Brandon Inge and got the light-hitting Josh Anderson to ground out to end the threat. He then set the side down in order in the fifth and sixth before his 99-pitch count (inflated by Cousins’ strike zone) and the Yankees’ long top of the seventh ended his night.

Hughes best pitch of the night came on a 0-1 count to Placido Polanco with two out in the bottom of the fifth. It was a curveball that Polanco was convinced was coming right at his head. A look of total fear came over Polanco’s face as he began to bail. The pitch then dropped over the plate for a called strike on the inside corner, knee-high. Sick.

Hughes was followed by Mark Melancon, whom Joe Girardi had warming up before the game became a laugher. Melancon worked a 1-2-3 seventh, striking out Inge in the process. I can’t wait to see Hughes and Melancon team up again.

The talented Mr. Hughes is back and will take the hill for the Yanks tonight against the Tigers.

Rah Rah Ree, Kick ‘Em in the Kneee/
Rah Rah Ras, Kick ‘Em in the Other Knee

Maybe this will satisfy Allen Barra. And maybe you can snap your fingers to this:

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This week’s “Card Corner” has no connection to the Yankees. In fact, this man may be the most obscure player ever profiled in this feature. But he was important to us as kids in 1974, if only because he had such a weird name. And he has become a record-breaker among major league players.

As young fans growing up in Westchester County, we found it both foolishly fun and humorously cruel to repeat the quirky names of certain ballplayers over and over. One of those players was Paul Schaal (pronounced PAWL SHAWL), one of the few big leaguers whose last name rhymed with his first. Along with Lu Blue, Mark Clark, Don Hahn and Greg Legg, Schaal must have taken his share of verbal abuse about that as a child.

A couple of other intriguing facts come to mind when thinking about Paul Schaal. He was the Kansas City Royals’ last regular third baseman before a fellow named George Brett burst onto the major league scene. A certified Hall of Famer and the owner of the most attractive batting swing of the late 20th century—I’ll put him just ahead of Ken Griffey, Jr. in that regard—Brett made most Royals fans forget all about Schaal. Still, Schaal was not a bad ballplayer. Schaal was certainly a better player than most of the third sackers the Yankees were trotting out at the time, an illustrious group that included Bobby Cox and Jerry Kenney. While with the LA and California Angels in the mid-1960s, Schaal established a reputation as one of the game’s finest fielding third baseman. One member of the Angels even called Schaal the equal of Brooks Robinson, generally regarded as baseball’s most divine defensive third baseman of all-time.

Offensively, Schaal showed promise as a youngster, until he was hit in the head by a pitched ball during the 1968 season. The injury left the Angels understandably worried about his future, so they left him exposed in the expansion draft that winter. As one of four new teams entering the major leagues, the Royals snapped up Schaal, hoping that he would recover fully from the beanball incident.

After initially clashing with Royals skipper Charlie Metro, Schaal settled in nicely as KC’s cornerman. In 1971, he used remarkable patience at the plate, walking 103 times to formulate a .387 on-base percentage, while playing in every Royals game that season. He slumped to a .228 average in 1972 before rebounding to hit .288 with eight home runs the following season. Unfortunately, Schaal’s game fall off badly in 1974, prompting a trade back to California, where he finished out his career with the Halos. In the meantime, Mr. Brett staked permanent claim to Kansas City’s “hot corner.”

While Schaal never achieved much more than temporary stardom with the Royals, he has managed to become one of the most successful of ex-ballplayers in his post-playing days. After owning a chain of pizza shops, Schaal went into the unrelated field of chiropractics. (From pizza to ‘practics.) Schaal became Dr. Schaal, which sounds an awful lot like Dr. Scholl, the foot doctor. But it’s Dr. Schaal, practicing back specialist. The good doctor now runs the Schaal Health & Wellness Center in Overland Park, Kansas, and is considered an expert in network spinal analysis. As the doctor’s website points out, “At Schaal Health Center, we use Young Living Essential Oils daily to diffuse the air with their therapeutic aromas.” As a child of the seventies, that sounds pretty good to me.

Here’s something else that you might find interesting about Paul Schaal. He has been married nine times. (That’s got to be a record for a major leaguer. Nine times!) It would be most appropriate for Paul Schaal to be interviewed on CNN by Larry King. How great would that be?

Today’s news is powered by some REALLY bad cartoon featuring the Tampa Bay Rays:

• Here are the rehab updates on Alex Rodriguez and Chien-Ming Wang:

Rodriguez, who had surgery on his right hip March 9, could take live batting practice for the first time Tuesday. He might start playing in minor league games later this week and the Yankees expect him to rejoin the team by May 15. . . .

The three-time AL MVP ran the bases for the third time in five days, and added situational drills when taking grounders at third. He hit 13 homers on 89 swings in regular batting practice. . . .

“We need to see him slide,” Girardi said. “He hasn’t done that yet unless he went out on a Slip And Slide in his yard.”

Wang threw in the outfield for 10 minutes and did sprints as part of a rehab program. He was placed on the 15-day disabled list Saturday with weakness in his hips. . . .

“He’s doing great,” Yankees vice president Billy Connors said. “There is no discomfort. We did some drills that will help bring his velocity back to where it’s got to be.”

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