"A New York Treasure" --Village Voice

Anger Management

My wife doesn’t like yelling or screaming. It makes her uneasy. So you can imagine the scene during a ball game. She can put up with me only so long. I’m far less volatile than I once was, honest. But the truth is, my wife just doesn’t get it.

The Yankees had a 3-0 lead in the second inning when Alex Rodriguez came to the plate with the bases loaded and two out. Johnny Damon hit his second double of the game two batters earlier–it bounced over the center field fence, keeping Derek Jeter, who singled for his second time in as many at bats, at third, a bad break for the Yankees. Mark Teixeira walked and then Rodriguez popped out.

So I yelled. My wife got annoyed and said, “What’s your problem? They’re winning.”

Like I said, she doesn’t get it. Ah, if only her name was Mae.

Joba Chamberlain had a tight breaking ball working in the first couple of innings but he labored in the third as he lost command of his fastball and sure enough coughed-up the lead. Scott Richmond, on the other hand, got his act together. He featured a hard, sharp slider and a wicked 12-6 curve ball and struck out eight. After getting Rodriguez out, Richmond pitched four scoreless innings. Each starter went six.

I watched the game with a puss on my face. I stopped yelling, opting to stew instead. At least my cat, Moe Green (pictured below), understands. I resisted the temptation to tell my wife a thing or three about baseball and how the game works. It was not easy to hold my tongue, believe me. But why be a schmuck? 

mean-mo

Jesse Carlson, the left-hander who struck Jorge Posada out in a twelve-pitch at bat on Monday night, came in to pitch the eighth. Godzilla Matsui hit a 2-2 pitch deep to right but foul. Next pitch, different result, as Matsui hit a bomb into the right centerfield seats, tying the game. Posada was next and he skied a back-door breaking ball deep to right. Joe Inglett, his back to the wall, jumped and missed the ball. A fat man wearing a beige Yankee cap and an off-white Mickey Mantle t-shirt stood in the first row and placed his black mitt on top of the wall. The ball fell into the pocket, another cheapie Yankee Stadium dinger, and the Yanks had the lead. The home run was reviewed but it stood–nice job by the fan.

Melky Cabrera, celebrating his 25th birthday, added an RBI single (his second RBI of the game) against Josh Roenicke and Damon drove the birthday boy home with an RBI base hit of his own–his third hit of the day (he was also robbed of a double). Jeter had three hits as well.

With one out the ninth, Mariano Rivera left a cutter over the heart of the plate and Edwin Encarnacion crushed it over the center field fence for a home run. Rivera grimaced–hey, that’s how I’ve been feeling all night!, I said (…to myself). A base hit to Rod Barajas brought the tying run to the plate. But Rivera caught Inglett looking at an outside fastball, and got Marco Scutaro to chase a cutter to end the game.

Final Score: Yanks 7, Blue Jays 5.

Fist pumps and cheers. Relief.

My wife resisted the urge to tell me a thing or three about the Yankees. She did not call me a schmuck–even if that is what she was thinking–and we went to bed happy.

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26 comments

1 thelarmis   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:28 pm

smoltz refuses minor league assignment for boston

jeff weaver to start for torre tomorrow

2 Shaun P.   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:35 pm

[1] Some NL team will sign Smoltz, maybe to work out of the 'pen. He could get by there, with the right park and the right defense behind him . . .

[0] My wife "gets it" but doesn't like my yelling or screaming either. Moe Green's expression matches my dad's when he gets upset at the Yanks - something that, for him, has gotten worse as he's gotten older. So much for mellowing with age! ;)

3 ms october   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:37 pm

[1] the circle of life - man i still hate jeff weaver

[0] moe g looks like he was annoyed at joba too.

good win though. bats came through when it mattered and bruney might be back on track.

4 thelarmis   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:40 pm

[2] yeah, smoltz has a major itch to pitch. he says he issues are just mechanical and is ready to go...

5 NYYfan22   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:44 pm

Gotta feel good with Burnett pitching the rubbagame. Let's go Yankees!

Nice job on SNY, Alex.

6 Shaun P.   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:48 pm

[4] I think Smoltz is toast, but I'm not surprised he isn't giving up.

Still, it'd be awesome if the HoF could put him, Glavine, and Maddux all in at the same time - Maddux is going to a year early though.

7 thelarmis   ~  Aug 11, 2009 10:58 pm

[6] i thought Rickey's induction speech was boring and disappointing. i think Maddux's is going to be surprisingly hilarious. he was the king of one-liners and i loved reading all his quotes in the local paper.

pitchers duel so far at the Big A...

8 edoubletrouble   ~  Aug 11, 2009 11:13 pm

aah love. you ol' dog.

9 Rich   ~  Aug 11, 2009 11:23 pm

The crowd chanting HB to Melky during the AB in which he got the tack on RBI was pretty cool.

Joba's inconsistency concerns me.

10 JeremyM   ~  Aug 11, 2009 11:28 pm

[6] Does Glavine have to wait an extra year since he only pitched in the minors? I know it didn't hurt Rickey, although he only played in independent baseball.

11 Just Fair   ~  Aug 11, 2009 11:40 pm

[9] I agree. He really should have it al figured it out by now. That's what you get for a head-case I guess.
: D Just kidding.
[0] My wife tells me to not yell b/c I make her nervous. Plus it makes my dog Mickey hide in the spare bedroom. But my belief is if you're not yelling you're not paying attention.

12 Mr. OK Jazz TOKYO   ~  Aug 12, 2009 12:38 am

As long as I don't scream and yell when Mr. OK Jazz Jr is sleeping, my lady doesn't seem to mind it..she even now knows the words to "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" and gets Jazz Jr to sing along.

13 Rich   ~  Aug 12, 2009 1:16 am

[11] I was referring more to any possible underlying physical issues.

14 Just Fair   ~  Aug 12, 2009 1:50 am

[13] He was 91-95,96 in the first and fifth. Breaking stuff is a matter of control. I don't think Joba has any underlying physical issues imo.

15 thelarmis   ~  Aug 12, 2009 2:36 am

this is kinda bizzare:

AJ Burnett and Ricky Romero come in with nearly identical numbers. How close are they? Well, Burnett is 10-5 with a 3.67 ERA. Romero is 10-5 with a 3.66 ERA. They also hold the exact same WHIP: 1.37.

Day Game tomorrow. i'll catch bits and pieces online, i suppose...

16 Mr. OK Jazz TOKYO   ~  Aug 12, 2009 2:44 am

I wonder if Rick Pitino will update his book now on how winners conduct payoffs??

17 Rich   ~  Aug 12, 2009 3:19 am

[14] Last year, he was often averaging 95+ and topping out at 98+ as a starter with more Ks. Since injuring his shoulder in Texas last season, he has never returned to that level. Maybe it's just arm strength, but I think there could be a physical problem, otherwise, how can that disparity be explained?

18 Eddie Lee Whitson KO   ~  Aug 12, 2009 4:20 am

And dont look now, but the Rays are borderline at the moment. As much as we deflated Boston's divisional hopes, the Rays arent really poised for post-season, 9 games back.

Let's finish off the blow jays tomorrow and take it to Oakland. The Colisseum gets no love, but I went to many great games and concerts there, holds a special place in my heart ~ especially when the yankees win.

Hoping for Good AJ,

Ed L. Whitson, Pugilist

19 Mattpat11   ~  Aug 12, 2009 8:48 am

I need someone to make me a clip of Youkilis charging like a spaz and getting tossed on his face set to the Benny Hill theme.

20 Sliced Bread   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:12 am

[19] Benny Hill would be appropriate, but I'm sure some earnestly dimwitted Sox fan has already put that clip to Twisted Sistah's wicked anthem "We're Not Gonna Take It."

21 RagingTartabull   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:14 am

[7] Agreed on Rickey, I was expecting something Ueckeresque and was severely disappointed.

I think Maddux will be a great speaker, I could also see Big Unit being good (seriously!), and Mussina if he ever makes it

22 Mattpat11   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:18 am

[20] It amazes me that Sox fans (and I've seen them to) think Youkilis came off well in this. He charged like a lunatic, tossed his helmet at a man, and then got thrown on his face.

23 The Mick536   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:18 am

A secret to a wonderful marriage is to always go to sleep with your spouse happy.

24 Rich   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:45 am

[22] Youkilis came off well in the sense that by taking two for the team (the HBP and the body slam) he probably got his team a win because but for Procello's ejection, the RS probably would have lost.

25 Mattpat11   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:54 am

I see.

26 Sliced Bread   ~  Aug 12, 2009 9:57 am

[24] that line of thinking is too rational for the average YOOOOOK fan.

He's being applauded for a.) exhibiting rage, and triggering the mythological "turning point of the season" b.) exhibiting rage and giving Sox fans something to talk about besides the last two weeks of humiliation c.) exhibiting rage and temporarily solving the Sox lineup problem with his impending suspension, and d.) just exhibiting rage.

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"This ain't football. We do this every day."
--Earl Weaver