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Yanks Headed For a Lost Weekend in Boston

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The Yanks are so lousy right now the announcers were cranky with them last night.

Gwon’ be a mighty long season, ain’t it?

Ah, never mind nuthin’:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Ouch, Quit it; Ouch, Quit it

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Yeah, well, so Friday night went about as expected. The Yanks didn’t hit for shit and it came back to bite them when Cookie Monster popped a 2-run home run just over the Green Monster off a hanging Dellin Betances breaking ball that got too much of the outside part of the plate. The final was 4-2. Alex had some good at bats, hit a home run early, and got robbed by Bogarts late—got to admit, I really like that Bogarts, man. Oh well, whadda ya gonna do? They’re at it again tonight, and we’ll be rooting.

Never mind the awful truth:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Comedy Isn’t Pretty

gumball

The hapless-hittin’ Yanks limp into Fenway tonight and you wonder if this is going to be a season of ass-beatings or what? Way the Yankees have been hitting, it wouldn’t come as any surprise. Then again, a cruddy Yankee team could have the Sox number, who the hell knows? Either way, we’ll be here rooting.

Never mind the hub-bub:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Well, At Least A Rod Got Three Hits

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Yeah, didn’t figure that’d work either. And it’s a shame because C.C. pitched a lovely game, he really did. But when you don’t score runs it is tough to win games. Know what I mean, Vern?

Well, At Least A Rod’s Back in the Lineup

ralph and ed

Right?

Ah, never mind the re-runs:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Morning Art

thiebaud

Thiebaud. 

Um…

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Well, at least it didn’t last long, less than two-and-a-half hours. The Yanks took it on the chin last night in Texas—10-1—but have no fear, slide on over to Esquire Classic and read all about George Frazier, the King of Style. It’s a nice distraction, I swear.

So Fresh and So Clean

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Man, Eovaldi finally put together the big one, eh?—a real masterful performance, carrying a no-hitter into the seventh. Good for him. Betances got touched for a solo dinger in the eighth but was otherwise stingy and Miller sailed through the ninth on less than ten pitches to give the Yanks a tidy 3-1 win. Gotta be pleased for Eovaldi, I find him easy to root for, the big lug.

More tonight. Winning is fun. How bout some more?

Never mind the brisket:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

 

 

Beat of the Day

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It’s been awhile. Too long. Listen to the 1944 Esquire All-American Jazz Concert. It’s hot.

Walk This Way

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Back on the road, first stop—Texas.

Never mind the riff raff:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Get Outta Town

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Yanks caught a beating from the Rays yesterday at the Stadium and Alex Rodriguez left the game early with an oblique injury. Team now shuffles off to Texas for three against the Rangers.

Meanwhile, over at Esquire Classic, last week gave a bunch of good stories, including features from the new issue (the last edited by David Granger)—a funny Q&A with George Clooney and a chilling feature by Tom Junod about one of the approximately 70,000 adult women who are reported missing each year. I also interviewed Junod about the piece, here. Finally, David Hirshey was the guest on the latest Esquire Classic Podcast giving us the behind-the-scenes scoop on Richard Ben Cramer’s classic profile of Ted Williams. Listen in.

Yeah, Like That

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Good win last night—Oh, Gardy—more this afternoon.

Never mind the chill:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Here Comes Ellsbury

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Jacoby Ellsbury stole home last night, the play of this young season. It tied the game and the Yanks won 6-3.

So sweet.

They’re at it again this afternoon.

Try, Try Again

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Man, do our guys ever need a win. No relief as the Rays are in town for the weekend.

Ah, never mind the dreck:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

The Old Gray Mare

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…ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be.

Low times in the Bronx.

 

Step by Step

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I think Luis Severino is going to pitch a good game tonight and I think the Yanks will score enough to win. Then again, I’ve been known to be wrong.

Never mind the weak sticks:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

 

Prince Was All Duende

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Another huge loss. Prince is dead at 57. He was one-of-a-kind and had what George Frazier used to croon about—he had duende, that special combination of charisma, talent, looks, style and magic.

Back in 1997, Mark Jacobson wrote in Esquire, that Prince “dominated the eighties music scene as Louis Armstrong did that of the twenties, as Charlie Parker did that of the forties. Eloquently exploiting his gender/race dichotomies with a horny sincerity that made him the legitimate successor to such crossover gods as Little Richard and Jimi Hendrix, the Artist was indisputably the Man.”

I was never a huge fan myself but liked more than enough of his music and certainly admired his genius—“horny sincerity” is about perfect.

Rest in Peace.

And You May Ask Yourself

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It was same old song for the Yanks last night. I mean, Carlos Beltran is still hitting, and Didi Gregarious is a little too, but the rest of the team is struggling. Boy, are they ever. If I had anything good to say, I’d say it.

A’s 5, Yanks 2. 

Picture by Bags

Back to Work

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Just gots to grit and grind until you pepper out a win, eh, fellas? Ya bunch of scrubs, c’mon now. We’re still here for you but let’s go.

At it again tonight at the Stadium. Little cooler than last night, but it was another beautiful spring day in New York.

Never mind the awful truth:

Let’s GO Yank-ees!

 

Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One Before

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Tight game, nice pitching, no hitting. Sound familiar? Get used to it, folks—wait, you say you’re already used to it? Well, then I’m out of tricks.

Yanks lose 3-2 in 11.

Le sigh.

[Photo Via: This Isn’t Happiness]

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"This ain't football. We do this every day."
--Earl Weaver