Daily Archives: January 14, 2004

According to ESPN, the Chicago Cubs have made a two-year offer to future Hall of Fame pitcher Greg Maddux. Perhaps feeling the squeeze after the Astros upgraded their staff with a Hall of Famer of their own this week, the Cubs made what seems like a logical offer to Maddux. Maddux wouldn’t have to be the ace of the staff, plus Chicago would get a shot to have the Mad Dog win his 300th game in a Cubbies uniform.

Sounds appealing to me, even though the deal calls for Maddux to make between $6 million and $7 million per year, which would represent a dramatic paycut. It should be especially appealing for all those unemployed, gold-bricking Cubs fans that former manager Lee Elia once lambasted. Oh yeah, I’ve heard that the Cubs are now the Yuppie team of cherce in Chicago. But let us not forget the bleacher bums who were celebrated by Elia in a fateful postgame press conference, back in 1983:

Eighty-five percent of the people in this country work. The other fifteen percent come here and boo my players. They oughta go out and get a fucking job and find out what it’s like to go and a earn a fucking living. Eighty-five percent of the fucking world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A fucking playground for the cocksuckers.

Bring Maddux back, Cubbies. Give the bums and the Yuppies some gravy. And then make Ruzich and Carroll really happy and go sign Pudge to boot.

OH, YOU DIRTY RAT

Some Yankee fans are moaning about the fact that Roger Clemens has signed with the Astros. He was ripped in the tabloids yesterday; today, Roger’s sister defends his actions in The Post. Really, I can’t get behind being upset with Clemens. I’m not surprised he’s chosen to play for the Astros; makes all the sense in the world to me (Actually, I was skeptical that 2003 was his swan song). Nor am I in the slightest bit upset that he won’t be a Yankee this year, at least from a personality perspective (it’s likely he’s still got some good innings left). Has he ruined his chances of wearing a Yankee cap when he goes into the Hall of Fame? Probably, but so what? It’s only fitting that he should go in as a Red Sox. So I don’t get what all the cryin is about. But hey, you’ve got to find a way to sell papers in the middle of winter, right? Got to find something heated to keep you going in this bone-chilling weather. Fortunately, we New Yorkers have insulation: we’ve got enough hot air to keep us warm 365 days a year, thank you very much.