Daily Archives: May 23, 2003

The Fan Who Wasn’t There

I worked for Joel and Ethan Coen from the late summer of 1996 through the fall of 1997. I had been working as an apprentice film editor in New York when I went to work for them, first as their personal assistant and later as an editing room assistant on their movie, The Big Lebowski.  We were in Manhattan, at their office for the first six weeks; in November we went out to Los Angeles, where Lebowski was shot on location. After the film was in the can, Joel and Ethan returned to New York to cut the film.

In October of 1996, when the Yankees won their first title since 1978, we were still in New York, so the Coen brothers are tied up in my baseball memories. Joel had no interest in the game at all, but Ethan seemed vaguely aware of what was happening. His wife Tricia, who was the co-editor of Lebowski, as well as the script supervisor, was the sports nut. We stood on line outside of the Yankee clubhouse on 5th avenue to try and get World Serious tickets to no avail.

Ethan Coen’s favorite player on the Yankees was Kenny Rogers. “The Gambler” was like some half-wit out of one of their movies: well meaning, but hapless. The worse Rogers performed for the Yankees, the more shit he got from the fans and the media, the more Ethan liked him. We used to call him “Kenny Everyman” cause Kenny kinda looked like he could be just about anybody. A schmuck.

Nowadays, Tricia is in a fantasy league and Ethan likes to play the guitar. (He yodels too; in fact, one of the best parts of hanging out with Eth and Trish was that they turned me onto Jimmie Rogers, Hank Williams, Webb Pierce and George Jones.) I’ve spoken with Trish several times recently about her league, and she’s taken to it like a bee to honey. Ethan and Joel were been busy mixing the sound to their latest movie this spring, a big-budget studio comedy—a romantic comedy—fittingly titled Intolerable Cruelty. (George Clooney and Catherine Zeta Jones star, and the film will be released in October.)

I finally caught up with Ethan on the phone last week. But first, Tricia and talked some baseball. She was indignant that Torre had been starting Jason Giambi at the DH when he hits better when he plays in the field. Ethan was picking a guitar in the background, noodling around.

“It’s bullshit, man. He’s messing up my fantasy league team,” Tricia told me.

I tried to reason with her but she wasn’t having it, so she passed the phone to her husband, who momentarily stopped playing his axe. Ethan can be a man of few words. It’s not that he doesn’t like talking; it’s just that sometimes he’d rather not be bothered (especially when he’s dicking around on the guitar). Although both Joel and Ethan are definitely Jewish, and definitely New Yorkers, they are definitely not Jewish New Yorkers. There are a lot of meaningful silences; a lot of pregnant pauses that I assume has something to do with growing up in the middle of the country.

Here is an excerpt of our conversation:

Eth: Al?

BB: Eth.

Eth: How are ya?

BB: I’m good. Nu?

Eth: I’m good. You know, I don’t have any thoughts on baseball, though. I quit following it.

(Starts playing the guitar again.)

BB: You quit?

Eth: Ya.

BB: Completely?

Eth: Ya.

(Guitar playing stops.)

BB: Wow. That’s no good. Where did it all go wrong? I mean didn’t you play as a kid?

Eth: No.

(More guitar.)

BB: Did you want to play as a kid?

Eth: I went to games as a kid.

BB: Zolio Versalles.

Eth: Yeah, Zolio. You know. Harmon Killebrew. Rod Carew was with the Twins then. Tony Oliva.

BB: Oliva was good.

Eth: Yeah.

BB: Did you like baseball movies as a kid?

Eth: No.

BB: Do you like them now?

Eth: No.

BB: Has there ever been a good baseball movie?

(Long pause.)

Eth: No.

BB: Really?

Eth: Is there? I don’t think so.

BB: Bad News Bears?

Eth: Bad News Bears: Excellent picture! Yeah, yeah. You’re right. But just that one.

(More guitar.)

BB: Most of them bite. Field of Dreams was painful. The Natural was wack.

Eth: Yeah.

BB: You guys would make a good baseball movie.

Eth: I don’t think so. No, you know, Bad News Bears: you’re right. It’s a really good movie.

BB: Well, that was a great interview man.

Eth: You know what you can put down? You can say that I quit being a baseball fan when the Yankees traded Mickey Rivers.

BB: What the hell kind of thing is that to say? What about your boy, Kenny Rogers?

Eth: Is he still playing?

BB: Yeah, he’s still playing. He plays on your hometown godamn team for crying out loud. He’s on the Twins.

Eth: Shit. (Laughs) “Kenny Everyman.”

BB: Mr. Square Jaw himself. Kenny Everyman is as good as he ever was, and he’s even funnier now cause he’s older, and more mulish than ever.

Eth: Yeah, I should see the Twins the days that he pitches.

BB: The best thing that guy ever did on the Yankees was when they had the World Series parade, and after stinking up the joint all year long, he was up on top of the float hooping and hollering louder than anyone.

Eth: Yeah, he was waving a flag. Pleased as punch. with pride. (Laughs) That’s really funny. That’s good.

BB: Mick the Quick, huh?

Eth: Yeah, I quit being a fan when the Yankees traded him.

Well, there you have it: Ethan Coen is not a baseball fan. But that doesn’t prevent him from making good movies, or giving one hell of an interview.

Hope everyone has a great Memorial Day Holiday.

P.S. Joel and Ethan left for Los Angeles last week to begin their next show–a remake of the old Alec Guiness comedy The Lady Killers. It’ll star Tom Hanks, and according to Joel, “you know, well, a whole lot of other people.”

I CAN’T CALL IT

Ed Cossette’s piece yesterday about Curt Gowdy reminds you why good announcers are hard to find:

Gosh, even at 83 years old he ran circles last night around [Chris] Berman. Well, I take that back. It’s not necessarily that he came across as more knowledgeable of the game, just more natural, easy, more reflective of what it feels like (or the way I want it to feel like) watching a game. This is the total opposite of listening to guys like Berman who don’t really sound like they are enjoying the game so much as enjoying hearing themselves talk. I always feel like Berman is in a constant mental brain cramp trying to come up with the perfect expression or great turn of phrase. He gives me the sense that the game exists merely as a stage for his performance. And I shouldn’t single out Berman, as this is the feeling I get from most the “modern” broadcasters, though Berman is the best example.

While Berman et al make me feel anxious and uptight, Gowdy puts me into a deep trance. My very breaths become the ebb and flow of the game.

Aaron Gleeman added an excellent critique of ESPN’s Baseball Tonight crew, espcially his comments regarding Karl Ravech:

Now, all of a sudden, Karl Ravech (the main host) thinks he should be the one dispensing opinions, instead of just hosting the damn show. Karl Ravech!

The other night, when [Doug] Mientkiewicz hurt his ankle, Karl Ravech started talking about how the injury was going to “seriously hurt the Twins because they don’t have any depth.” I wanted to punch him through my TV set. The Twins don’t have any depth?! I don’t think it is hyperbole to suggest that the Minnesota Twins have more hitting depth than any team in baseball right now.

…Please, just host the show Karl! If we wanted to hear all of your brilliant comments and opinions, why would ESPN bother with journalists like Gammons and Stark or ex-players like Reynolds and Dibble? Why not just make it “Baseball Tonight with Karl Ravech,” since I’m sure everyone is dying to hear what some talking head that is really good at reading a teleprompter thinks.

What both writers point out so convincingly is how many modern announcers (or in-studio hosts) feel as if they are more important than the stories they are covering. I have the same beef with Michael Kay over at the YES network. He thinks he has something to do with the Yankees success, and he forces the issue, trying to make every moment melodramatic and important. The results are as campy as they are infuriating.

This is about the cult of personality. Announcers aren’t content letting the action unfold, they want to manufacture the action. Worse, they want to be the action.
Kay came up through the ranks as a beat writer, so he has a knack for stirring the pot. Primarily through his work as John ‘Silver Throat’ Sterling’s straight man on the radio during the Yankees great run, Kay is now a minor celebrity himself. He now calls the games on TV, has his own radio show on ESPN, and his own version of “Inside the Actor’s Studio” on the YES network. Like Ravech, his opinion of himself is completely out of whack.

Fortunately for us, Ken Singleton and Jim Kaat (and especially Paul O’Neill) love to rib Kay. As Kaat said the other day when Kay had the day off, “You can’t stop him, you can only hope to contain him.”

WWJD?

Carlos Delgado, and Vernon Wells led the League’s best offense past Andy Pettitte and the Yankees last night at the Stadium, 8-3. To be honest, they spanked the Yanks, but good. Pettitte has now lost four games in a row—the first time that has happened in his career, prompting me to ask rhetorically: “Hey Andy, what would Jesus do, big fella?”

After learning that they will be without Bernie Williams for a while, it was a somber and soggy night in Yankeeville. Jorge Posada was hit by a pitch twice, the second time in the right foot. He was removed from the game, but appears to be okay.

On a positive note, Roger Clemens appears to be okay, and weather providing, he should start against the Sox on Monday.

Both Jason Giambi and Godzilla Matsui looked better at the plate last night. They each had two hits, and drove the ball well. The Yankees are going to rely on these guys more heavily now that Sweet Pea is gone.

Not for nothing, but I’m happy to see Carlos Delgado playing so well. He’s always been such an appealing player, and though his numbers dipped a bit over the past two seasons, he’s remained one of the scariest hitters in the league.

BUM BERNIE BUM

You can add Bernie Williams to the list of the Yankees walking wounded. After struggling mightily for the past few weeks with a balky knee, Williams had an MRI yesterday that revealed that he has torn cartilage in his left knee. Surgery is likely, and it would put the Yankees center fielder on the DL for 4-6 weeks.

Ouch.

“It was just not letting me play the way I want to play,” Williams said. “That’s the most important thing. I’m trying to make a contribution to the team, and I wasn’t. I was hurting them – not hitting and not playing the way I’m capable. That doesn’t do anybody any good.”

I spoke with Will Carroll of Baseball Prospectus last night and he said that Williams’ injury is not unlike the one suffered by Randy Johnson. He said that Bernie should return, good as new after the All-Star break.

Juan Rivera will be called up from Columbus and most likely platoon in left field with Bubba Trammell as Godzilla Matsui moves into center.

BEST IN THE BUSINESS

Buster Olney has a nice appreciation of the best closer in baseball in today’s New York Times. And no, his name isn’t Mariano Rivera. It’s John Smoltz. Atlanta’s erstwhile starter admits that he doesn’t want to be a closer for the rest of his career. Smoltz has been compared with Dennis Eckersley, who will most likely make the Hall of Fame in the next few years for his body of work as both a terrific starting pitching as well as a dominating closer, but Smoltz doesn’t see himself walking in Eck’s footsteps:

”It’s a totally different situation, although I’m honored to be mentioned with him,” Smoltz said. ”There’s no doubt that what he did as a closer, he set a pretty high bar. But I don’t think it’s the same circumstances. I don’t think it’s the same trend.

”I don’t want this to come out the wrong way, but from what everyone told me was that, basically, he was relegated to that role. He was struggling as a starter, and in that role, he flat-out flourished. I don’t think I was forced into this role. I felt like I had a lot more to give as a starter, but it is what it is.”

While Smoltz would eventually like to return to the starting rotation, what makes him stand-out from his peers is that he doesn’t simply rely on one pitch:

Smoltz has three extraordinary pitches: a fastball that was clocked at 99 miles an hour in San Diego last weekend, a slider that dives away from right-handed batters and a splitter that veers under the swings of left-handed batters, at a staggering 90 to 92 m.p.h.

…”I can’t really think of another closer who can throw three pitches and make you look stupid,” said Austin Kearns, the Cincinnati outfielder ranked among the league leaders in runs batted in.

Olney notes that Smoltz, like Rivera is an exceptional athlete. Both of them look beautiful shagging fly balls. I wonder how many years Smoltzie would have to put in as a great closer for him to be considered for the Hall. Perhaps Eck’s fate will determine how we consider Smoltz’s place in history. Or, maybe Smoltz will write his own ticket, if he goes back and has some success as a starting pitcher again, after being a stud closer.

Mmmm.