Yeah, the Yanks were down by a run in the 8th inning and yeah all seemed lost but then came an unexpected shipment of protein power from the rarely-seen Score Truck.

Double take. Spit take. And we’ll take it, thank you very much.

10-4, good buddy.

The gluten-free Yanks limp in to Minnesota to play four against the Twins.

Alex Rodriguez will begin a rehab assignment tomorrow. Tonight, Andy Pettitte tries to halt the Yankees’ losing streak at five.

Brett Gardner CF
Jayson Nix SS
Robinson Cano 2B
Vernon Wells RF
Travis Hafner DH
Zoilo Almonte LF
Lyle Overbay 1B
Chris Stewart C
David Adams 3B

Never mind the Dybbuk:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Will Leitch on the Knicks trade and why New York teams fail:

The Knicks, essentially, not only took a contract albatross off Toronto’s hands — new GM Masai Ujiri was desperate to rid himself of the failed first overall pick — they paid the Raptors for the privilege. If the trade were just Camby and Novak for Bargnani, it would be a wash, two teams handing over each other’s soiled linens. But the Knicks threw in three draft picks because … well, because in New York, the future isn’t just something that doesn’t matter, it’s something to be actively avoided.

This has always been a thing in New York. For whatever reason, there is this sense among sports owners in New York City that rebuilding — or, rather to say, the process of compiling and amassing talent and resources that can be used to sustain perpetual success — is something that the fanbase will just not stand for. If your team is not competing for a championship that very year, obviously your franchise is a failure and unworthy to wear the words “New York” on the front of your jersey/uniform/sweater/hot pants.

This mindset leads to lunacy like just about every free agent acquisition the Mets have ever made — with the ironic exception of Carlos Beltran, the one many fans were the most angry about — or the Yankees giving Alex Rodriguez a 10-year contract or the Knicks trading for someone like Andrea freaking Bargnani. The logic behind the Bargnani trade, behind so many New York sports teams’ moves, is that if the move makes the team even slightly better today, it’s worth mortgaging whatever possible future there might be. Is having Bargnani on the team for the 2013-14 season better than having Camby and Novak? I find that an arguable point, but if the Knicks think so, and they do, then why not throw in three draft picks do make sure the deal goes down? We weren’t using them anyway! They’re draft picks!

So should the Yankees trade Robinson Cano, or what? They won’t but it’d be the ballsy move.

[Photo Credit: Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images]

ESPN analyst Orel Hershiser summed things up nicely towards the end of Sunday night’s death march: “The players who should be on the bench are in the starting lineup, and the players who should be in the lineup are on the disabled list.” It’s nothing new, but if Mariano Duncan were still around, he’d probably print up t-shirts with that explanation emblazoned across the chest. Admitting the problem is the first step.

At first glance it seemed as if the Yankees might have had the edge in Sunday night’s matchup in Baltimore, with Hiroki Kuroda going up against Chris Tillman, but Tillman’s been pretty good this year. In fact, the Orioles had won Tillman’s last seven starts, and Tillman had gotten the win in all but one of those games. Any American League pitcher with a 9-2 record and an ERA under four must be doing something right, and Tillman’s doing something right.

Regardless of how good Tillman might be, the Orioles have been carried by their hitting, and it didn’t take long for the Baltimore bats to make themselves heard. With one out in the first inning, third baseman Manny Machado hit a clothesline into the left field bleachers to give the Orioles a 1-0 lead and send a dagger into the heart of Yankee Universe. Even with all the talk we hear about Mike Trout and Bryce Harper, Machado just might be the best of the three, and as he circled the bases I couldn’t help but wonder where the next Yankee hero might come from. The prospects we’ve waited patiently for over the past few years (Jesus Montero, Austin Jackson, Austin Romine, Eduardo Nuñez, Slade Heathcott, Brandon Laird, etc.) have either been traded away, failed to make the majors, or simply evolved into interchangeable parts. In Machado, the Orioles have the face of their franchise for the next fifteen years. Wouldn’t that be nice?

The Yankee hitters weren’t thinking about any of that, though, as they managed to scrape together enough offense to tie the game in the top of the second. With runners on first and third and two outs, David Adams walked to load the bases, and Brett Gardner followed that with another walk to force in a run. It wasn’t exciting, but it was a run!

Just a few minutes later the Orioles struck back with yet another home run from Chris Davis, his 31st of the season and third of the series, and Nate McLouth homered in the next inning to give Baltimore a 3-1 lead.

The Yankees, meanwhile, were hitting as if their bats were made of apple sauce instead of ash. Only nine hitters came to bat in the third, fourth, and fifth innings (Hafner singled in the third but was thrown out at second trying to stretch), and except for a ten-pitch at bat by Brett Gardner in the fifth, Tillman never once had to work hard.

Canó led off the sixth with a solo home run to right center, giving the Yankees just a glimmer of hope, but that hope never amounted to much more than a glimmer, even when they put two runners on in the seventh and again in the ninth. Somehow those two rallies never felt like rallies.

After the 4-2 loss, the Yankees now find themselves in fourth place in the five-team American League East, and it won’t be long before they’re in the cellar. These are dark days, my friend. Dark days.

[Photo Credit: Patrick Smith/Getty Images]

Our man Hiroki tries to help the Yanks avoid getting swept in Baltimore.

Never mind any hard feelings:

Brett Gardner CF
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Robinson Cano 2B
Travis Hafner DH
Zoilo Almonte LF
Lyle Overbay 1B
Jayson Nix SS
Chris Stewart C
David Adams 3B

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Credit: Corriette Schoenaerts]

The Yankees got a couple of two-out singles in the first inning last night and then Ichiro! hit a Baltimore Chop off of home plate and high into the air which he of course beat out for a single. That was the highlight of the night for the Bombers. Well, Zoilo Almonte worked the count in his favor next and then put a good swing on a 3-1 pitch but Nick Markakis caught it in deep right field and that was that.

If you went to grab a bite or left the TV for a few minutes when you returned the O’s had put a beatin’ on David Phelps from which these gluten-free Yankees are ill-prepared to respond. It was 9-0, an old-fashioned ass-kicking, and certainly easier to stomach than Friday night’s loss. Chris Davis hit two bombs as the O’s cruised to an 11-3 lead.

The Lost Weekend, indeed.

David Phelps tries to help the Yanks get over last night’s tough loss.

Brett Gardner CF
Jayson Nix SS
Robinson Cano 2B
Vernon Wells DH
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Zoilo Almonte LF
David Adams 3B
Lyle Overbay 1B
Austin Romine C

Never mind the hangover:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Via: Magnificent Ruin]

It was a swift kick in the nuts kind of loss not because of a game-ending hit but because of a mid-innings comeback that vibrated, like the sensation of getting punched in the ball does, and lingered.

C.C. Sabathia had a no-hitter through five and a modest 3-0 lead. Considering all the hits the Yanks had in the early innings it should have been more but that’s how it goes when you’re on a non-gluten diet. In in the 6th, Nate McLouth led off with a hard single and then advanced to second on a bunt that rolled along the first base side of the field. David Adams, playing first, charged, leaving the bag open with no time for Robinson Cano, to cover. A mental mistake by Adams, for sure. The result, first and second and nobody out. Sabathia got Nick Markakis to pop out but then Manny Machado, that doubles-hitting machine–doubled to right center driving home both runners.

J. J. Hardy followed and popped out to centerfield and Machado took third, apparently catching Brett Gardner by surprise. The gamble paid off when Adam Jones had a cheap infield hit that scored the tying run.

Okay, 3-3 in the 7th. All was not lost. And Sabathia retired the first two hitters in bottom of the 7th before he left a flat breaking ball–slider or a curve–over the plate that McLouth sent over the right field wall. After he got the final out Sabathia returned to the dugout and rifled his mitt into the bench. He yelled and it was the most demonstrative show of emotion I remember seeing from him.

“You’ve got to finish the game, put a complete game together,” Sabathia said after the game. “I’m not saying go out and throw nine innings, but just put a good start, a complete start together. I feel like I haven’t done that all year.”

That one run lead was all the O’s would need as Tommy Hunter mowed the Yankees down in the final two innings and the O’s earned a 4-3 win.

Bollocks.

[Photo Credit: Doug Kapustin/Reuters]

It’s the Big Fella as the Yanks play a weekend series in Baltimore against the Orioles.

Brett Gardner CF
Jayson Nix SS
Robinson Cano 2B
Vernon Wells DH
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Zoilo Almonte LF
Chris Stewart C
David Adams 1B
Alberto Gonzalez 3B

Never mind the gluten-free offense:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Credit: Kevin B. Moore]

Phil Hughes allows a couple of runs in 8 innings of work, a nice day for any pitcher, but particularly for someone as inconsistent as Hughes. Course Derek Holland goes out and masters the Yankee hitters and shuts their asses out on 92 pitches, giving up only 2 hits.

Go fuggin’ figure.

Final Score: Rangers 2, yanks 0.

[Photo Via: Lomography]

Another hot n humid one out there. It’s Hughes and you have to imagine a bunch of homers.

1. Suzuki CF

2. Nix SS

3. Cano DH

4. Wells RF

5. Almonte LF

6. Overbay 1B

7. Adams 2B

8. Gonzalez 3B

9. Romine C

Never mind the sideshow:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Credit: Matt Slocum/AP]

Dig this nice gallery of Yankee fans over at Backspaces.

I missed the damn game and only saw that Joba got rocked and the Yanks lost, 8-5. But what’s a game when you’ve got Alex Rodriguez vs. the Yanks to keep you engaged (never mind the news that Mark Teixeira is lost for the season).

Here’s the latest in this silly big bucks soap opera of he-said, he-said from tabloid vets Bill Madden and Wallace Matthews.

Andy…

I’m not around for the line-ups. Let’s go for two straight, huh?

Never mind the sideshow:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Credit: Ry Pepper Via Think Different]

You want to rap about Alex Rodriguez acting like a dork and Brian Cashman acting like a dildo? Have at it.

Let’s pick this up at 3-1 in the fifth inning. Leonys Martin had just hit his second homer of the night off Hiroki Kuroda and Yu Darvish had a two-run lead to protect against this year’s gluten-free version of the Yankee lineup. Darvish dropped a little curve ball into Brett Gardner’s trigger zone – low and in – and boom, 3-2.

This curve ball was not the worst curve ball Darvish threw all night, but it was the wrong pitch in the wrong spot to the second best hitter on the New York Yankees (shudder). No, the honors for the worst curve ball of of the night must be split between the loopy bits of nothing Darvish threw to Travis Hafner (in the fourth) and to Jason Nix (in the seventh) which were both also hit for solo jacks.

Yu Darvish has been ridiculously good this year, loading up strikeouts against very few hits and walks. The only thing keeping him from full flight is a few more homers than you’d like to see – 14 after tonight. I can’t speak for the first 11, but for one game at least, he was handing out lollipops.

I snuggled up with Willa, the recent addition in our house and main reason why I’m not around the Banter much this season, and administered her first full-inning dose of Mariano Rivera. She stretched out on my chest and filled her diaper just about the time that Mo’s nastiest cutter reduced Lance Berkman’s bat to so many matchsticks.

Both catchers gunned down potential base stealers in the late innings to ratchet up the excitement a few notches. Chris Stewart pegged Elvis Andrus with the help of Robinson Cano’s nifty sweep tag. But A.J. Pierzynski evened the ledger by wiping Brett Gardner off the map in the bottom of the ninth. If you told me a few years ago that Brett Gardner became the Yankees second best offensive player while simultaneously losing his ability to steal bases, I’d have asked you how you got a hold of Doc Doom’s time machine and why you hadn’t also altered the 2001 and 2004 postseasons if you were planning on creating alternate Yankee universes.

The game seemed destined for extra innings, though with Rivera and Robertson nothing more then empty casings on the dugout floor heading to the top of the 10th, not many extra would likely be required. Then with two strikes and two outs, Ichiro lashed out and bit into a 97 MPH heater from Tanner Scheppers and ended things right then and there. Yankees 4, Rangers 3.

Hiroki Kuroda and Yu Darvish battled to a stand still. Darvish was more brilliant, but inefficient and only lasted six innings. Kuroda had plenty left in the tank and only came out because Leonys Martin had his number. And if any Japanese fans (I know a few who scalped tickets tonight) felt they didn’t get their money’s worth with the double no-decision from the starters, they hit the jackpot when Ichiro said sayonara.

And here’s our newest fan, as captured by my wife just after the homer, happy with a great victory over a good team.

Photos by Jason Szenes (1 & 2) / Getty Images & Kathy Willens (3) / AP & Amelia DeRosa (4) 

It’s our man Hiroki vs. Yu Darvish in what should be a good one in the Bronx.

Brett Gardner CF
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Robinson Cano 2B
Travis Hafner DH
Lyle Overbay 1B
Zoilo Almonte LF
Jayson Nix SS
David Adams 3B
Chris Stewart C

Never mind the heat:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Don’t hold your breath waiting for Tex, Alex and DJ to come to the Yankees’ rescue, writes Bill Madden.

[Photo Credit: Jevy]

Over at Stuff Nobody Cares About, dig this 1978 fun.

After the Old Timer’s Day festivities today, Ivan Nova returned from the DL and pitched a good game. According to Chad Jennings:

“Their guy really settled in,” [Joe] Maddon said. “I don’t understand why this guy struggles. I have never seen him bad. I don’t know — one of the best pitchers in the world as far as I’m concerned. He gets that hook over and he’s really tough on left-handers.”

Score was tied 1-1 in the seventh and there were two men out when Nova hit a batter (Desmond Jennings, elbow) and then another (Ben Zobrist, foot) and by the time the inning was over, three pitchers later, the Rays had a 2-run lead on the count of James Loney’s RBI single against Boone Logan.

A shame for sure but something had to give and after scoring a run in the first, the Yanks were blanked for the rest of the afternoon.

Final Score: Rays 3, Yanks 1.

So they settle for a split of the four-game series. Not stellar and not a disaster, pretty much like the Yankee season so far.