You want to rap about Alex Rodriguez acting like a dork and Brian Cashman acting like a dildo? Have at it.

Let’s pick this up at 3-1 in the fifth inning. Leonys Martin had just hit his second homer of the night off Hiroki Kuroda and Yu Darvish had a two-run lead to protect against this year’s gluten-free version of the Yankee lineup. Darvish dropped a little curve ball into Brett Gardner’s trigger zone – low and in – and boom, 3-2.

This curve ball was not the worst curve ball Darvish threw all night, but it was the wrong pitch in the wrong spot to the second best hitter on the New York Yankees (shudder). No, the honors for the worst curve ball of of the night must be split between the loopy bits of nothing Darvish threw to Travis Hafner (in the fourth) and to Jason Nix (in the seventh) which were both also hit for solo jacks.

Yu Darvish has been ridiculously good this year, loading up strikeouts against very few hits and walks. The only thing keeping him from full flight is a few more homers than you’d like to see – 14 after tonight. I can’t speak for the first 11, but for one game at least, he was handing out lollipops.

I snuggled up with Willa, the recent addition in our house and main reason why I’m not around the Banter much this season, and administered her first full-inning dose of Mariano Rivera. She stretched out on my chest and filled her diaper just about the time that Mo’s nastiest cutter reduced Lance Berkman’s bat to so many matchsticks.

Both catchers gunned down potential base stealers in the late innings to ratchet up the excitement a few notches. Chris Stewart pegged Elvis Andrus with the help of Robinson Cano’s nifty sweep tag. But A.J. Pierzynski evened the ledger by wiping Brett Gardner off the map in the bottom of the ninth. If you told me a few years ago that Brett Gardner became the Yankees second best offensive player while simultaneously losing his ability to steal bases, I’d have asked you how you got a hold of Doc Doom’s time machine and why you hadn’t also altered the 2001 and 2004 postseasons if you were planning on creating alternate Yankee universes.

The game seemed destined for extra innings, though with Rivera and Robertson nothing more then empty casings on the dugout floor heading to the top of the 10th, not many extra would likely be required. Then with two strikes and two outs, Ichiro lashed out and bit into a 97 MPH heater from Tanner Scheppers and ended things right then and there. Yankees 4, Rangers 3.

Hiroki Kuroda and Yu Darvish battled to a stand still. Darvish was more brilliant, but inefficient and only lasted six innings. Kuroda had plenty left in the tank and only came out because Leonys Martin had his number. And if any Japanese fans (I know a few who scalped tickets tonight) felt they didn’t get their money’s worth with the double no-decision from the starters, they hit the jackpot when Ichiro said sayonara.

And here’s our newest fan, as captured by my wife just after the homer, happy with a great victory over a good team.

Photos by Jason Szenes (1 & 2) / Getty Images & Kathy Willens (3) / AP & Amelia DeRosa (4) 

It’s our man Hiroki vs. Yu Darvish in what should be a good one in the Bronx.

Brett Gardner CF
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Robinson Cano 2B
Travis Hafner DH
Lyle Overbay 1B
Zoilo Almonte LF
Jayson Nix SS
David Adams 3B
Chris Stewart C

Never mind the heat:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Don’t hold your breath waiting for Tex, Alex and DJ to come to the Yankees’ rescue, writes Bill Madden.

[Photo Credit: Jevy]

I remember when this aired, shot while Scorsese was cutting Wise Guy (Good Fellas) in the Brill Building.

Again with the Kottke because it’s beautiful and I can’t stop reading and loving it.

[Photograph by Stanley Kubrick]

Frank Miller’s run with Daredevil was the first comic book series I collected as a kid.

Recently, the cool tumblr site, Beats, Comics and Life ran all of the Miller Daredevil covers. Here are some of my favorites:

‘Nuff said.

Let’s Get Stoopit with my man, Ill Chemist.

Via Kottke, The Beastles.

Over at Messy Nessy Chic here’s more on Vivian Maier.

Can’t wait for the movie…

Over at Stuff Nobody Cares About, dig this 1978 fun.

Rest in Peace, Bobby Blue Bland.

After the Old Timer’s Day festivities today, Ivan Nova returned from the DL and pitched a good game. According to Chad Jennings:

“Their guy really settled in,” [Joe] Maddon said. “I don’t understand why this guy struggles. I have never seen him bad. I don’t know — one of the best pitchers in the world as far as I’m concerned. He gets that hook over and he’s really tough on left-handers.”

Score was tied 1-1 in the seventh and there were two men out when Nova hit a batter (Desmond Jennings, elbow) and then another (Ben Zobrist, foot) and by the time the inning was over, three pitchers later, the Rays had a 2-run lead on the count of James Loney’s RBI single against Boone Logan.

A shame for sure but something had to give and after scoring a run in the first, the Yanks were blanked for the rest of the afternoon.

Final Score: Rays 3, Yanks 1.

So they settle for a split of the four-game series. Not stellar and not a disaster, pretty much like the Yankee season so far.

Old Timer’s Day at the Stadium this afternoon and then the Yanks go for the series win for the Rays.

Never mind the heat:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Credit: Jose Souto]

“Interior with Book,” By Richard Diebenkorn (1959)

David Adams has walked twice in his major league career and both came in yesterday’s game. The critical one came in the 7th inning. The Yanks were down 5-3 because Wil Myers hit a grand slam off C.C. Sabathia (and threw his bat a little too eagerly after he hit it, especially considering that Brett Gardner got a glove on it and the ball just skipped over the wall).

So the Yanks load the bases with one out, Jayson Nix and Adams due up. They’d had the same scenario a few innings earlier and both Nix and Adams stuck out.

In the 7th, Nix whiffed again–95 mph heater that was off the plate. But Adams put together a tough at bat and he drew a walk driving home a run. I didn’t think he had a chance at getting a hit but getting a walk was as impressive. And then, for some luck, some magic, whatever you want to call it–divine inspiration–Vernon Wells pinch-hit and down 0-2 he hit a bases clearing double.

What.

It was enough. Sabathia pitched well other than the Myers home run, Zoilo had another good game, and David Robertson and Mariano put heads to bed late as the Yanks won, 7-5.

Satisfaction.

[Photo Credit: Kahlua Nights; AP]

It’s C.C. on a warm summer afternoon in the Bronx.

Brett Gardner CF
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Robinson Cano 2B
Travis Hafner DH
Lyle Overbay 1B
Zoilo Almonte RF
Jayson Nix SS
David Adams 3B
Chris Stewart C

Never mind the heat:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

“Hot Fun In The Summertime” Sly and the Family Stone

[Photo Via: Film is God]

Sometimes there’s a man…

The Yanks got some much-needed pop from an unlikely source. Zoilo Almonte got three hits, including a solo home run, David Phelps and the Yankee bullpen kept the Rays in check, and the Yanks won, 6-2.

Zoilo, King for a Night, Wells, whadda ya know?

[Photo Credit: NJ Star-Ledger]

Yanks are winning tonight, dammit.

Chad Jennings has today’s notes. 

Brett Gardner CF
Ichiro Suzuki RF
Robinson Cano 2B
Travis Hafner DH
Lyle Overbay 1B
Zoilo Almonte LF
Jayson Nix SS
David Adams 3B
Austin Romine C

Never mind the change in seasons:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

[Photo Credit: Sophie Benjamin via Film is God]