"A New York Treasure" --Village Voice
Category: Yankees

Yanks Serve David Ortiz Crybaby Souffle

sluggo

This season might be skimpy on highlights come October but we can count the last ten minutes of Friday night’s game as one of them.

Here’s the scene: Yanks clinging to a 3-2 lead in the 9th, David Ortiz at the plate (of course), facing Andrew Miller with one out. Miller falls behind 3-1 and his next pitch, a breaking ball, fooled catcher Brian McCann but it was called a strike anyway (and looked like one, too). Ortiz yelled, stepped out the box and carried on like a bawling baby. His manager quickly came to his rescue and got thrown out. Then Ortiz looked at a called strike three, went back to the dugout before he charged back out. He too was tossed. I half-expected Jimmy Hart or Classy Freddie Blassie to climb out with him.

Far as I’m concerned it didn’t matter if Hanley Ramirez won the game. Seeing Ortiz take himself out of a critical at-bat because a call didn’t go his way was worth it. Now, he’ll make the Hall of Fame maybe one day and he’s a great hitter. But the guy seems to constantly get a pass for his tantrums. In the Globe this morning, Nick Carfare said “Ortiz will never be accused of mailing it in.” If this were A Rod it would be about how he acted unprofessionally and like an amateur and is a horrible, selfish teammate.

Naturally, he’s going to hit about 8 more homers against the Yanks this season, but hell, it was worth it.

Ramirez whiffed and Michael Kay embarrassed himself by calling the final strike like it was Game 7 of the ALCS. That, if anything, was a true indicator of just how bad this team is and how long this season will be. But it helped capped an entertaining couple of minutes.

The Full Fufkin

Artie Fufkin

The Sox are in town and the Yanks assume the position. Needles to say it’s supposed to rain all weekend.

C.C. joins Alex on the DL. Getting late early folks.

Never mind the forecast:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Putting in Work

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No, you heard right. The Yanks won. Handily. Cause it happens. Maybe you should want a refund. After all, winning is not what you expected. But you’ll have to take it and like it. (Best part was seeing C.C. pitch so well.)

They might g’head and win another one tonight. I mean, ya never know, am I right?

Never mind the prosperity:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Whadda Ya Hear, Whadda Ya Say?

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Here at Bronx Banter we’re not so much on top of the news these days. Due to my work schedule posting is down considerably—and just as the Yanks head into their losing seasons, so like a Yankee fan, right? Anyhow, I’m resigned to this being a losing season so I don’t feel any urgency in letting you know what you already know—the Yanks lost again last night. Course, they’ll be at it again tonight and we will be rooting. Cause that’s what we do no matter how cruddy the squad is.

Never mind bitchin’:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Dem Boids

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Yanks visit Baltimore for the first time this year.

Um, hey fellas, how bout a win?

Never mind the drizzle:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Why So Glum?

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The Yanks ain’t no suckers. Hell, they scored a mess o runs last night, man. But they are a bad team and bad teams find ways to not win, you know what I mean? Alex Rodriguez and co. roughed-up David Price but Nathan Eovaldi, sans splitty, matched Price is suckiness. Then our boy Betances gave up the go-ahead homer in the bottom of the seventh. Not likely to see that too often, blowing a couple of games in a series, but it happened to Mo so it can happen to Betances.

Drag. Final Score: Red Sox 8, Yanks 7.

Yanks Headed For a Lost Weekend in Boston

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The Yanks are so lousy right now the announcers were cranky with them last night.

Gwon’ be a mighty long season, ain’t it?

Ah, never mind nuthin’:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Ouch, Quit it; Ouch, Quit it

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Yeah, well, so Friday night went about as expected. The Yanks didn’t hit for shit and it came back to bite them when Cookie Monster popped a 2-run home run just over the Green Monster off a hanging Dellin Betances breaking ball that got too much of the outside part of the plate. The final was 4-2. Alex had some good at bats, hit a home run early, and got robbed by Bogarts late—got to admit, I really like that Bogarts, man. Oh well, whadda ya gonna do? They’re at it again tonight, and we’ll be rooting.

Never mind the awful truth:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Comedy Isn’t Pretty

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The hapless-hittin’ Yanks limp into Fenway tonight and you wonder if this is going to be a season of ass-beatings or what? Way the Yankees have been hitting, it wouldn’t come as any surprise. Then again, a cruddy Yankee team could have the Sox number, who the hell knows? Either way, we’ll be here rooting.

Never mind the hub-bub:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Well, At Least A Rod Got Three Hits

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Yeah, didn’t figure that’d work either. And it’s a shame because C.C. pitched a lovely game, he really did. But when you don’t score runs it is tough to win games. Know what I mean, Vern?

Well, At Least A Rod’s Back in the Lineup

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Right?

Ah, never mind the re-runs:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Um…

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Well, at least it didn’t last long, less than two-and-a-half hours. The Yanks took it on the chin last night in Texas—10-1—but have no fear, slide on over to Esquire Classic and read all about George Frazier, the King of Style. It’s a nice distraction, I swear.

So Fresh and So Clean

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Man, Eovaldi finally put together the big one, eh?—a real masterful performance, carrying a no-hitter into the seventh. Good for him. Betances got touched for a solo dinger in the eighth but was otherwise stingy and Miller sailed through the ninth on less than ten pitches to give the Yanks a tidy 3-1 win. Gotta be pleased for Eovaldi, I find him easy to root for, the big lug.

More tonight. Winning is fun. How bout some more?

Never mind the brisket:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

 

 

Walk This Way

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Back on the road, first stop—Texas.

Never mind the riff raff:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Get Outta Town

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Yanks caught a beating from the Rays yesterday at the Stadium and Alex Rodriguez left the game early with an oblique injury. Team now shuffles off to Texas for three against the Rangers.

Meanwhile, over at Esquire Classic, last week gave a bunch of good stories, including features from the new issue (the last edited by David Granger)—a funny Q&A with George Clooney and a chilling feature by Tom Junod about one of the approximately 70,000 adult women who are reported missing each year. I also interviewed Junod about the piece, here. Finally, David Hirshey was the guest on the latest Esquire Classic Podcast giving us the behind-the-scenes scoop on Richard Ben Cramer’s classic profile of Ted Williams. Listen in.

Yeah, Like That

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Good win last night—Oh, Gardy—more this afternoon.

Never mind the chill:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

Here Comes Ellsbury

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Jacoby Ellsbury stole home last night, the play of this young season. It tied the game and the Yanks won 6-3.

So sweet.

They’re at it again this afternoon.

Try, Try Again

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Man, do our guys ever need a win. No relief as the Rays are in town for the weekend.

Ah, never mind the dreck:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

The Old Gray Mare

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…ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be.

Low times in the Bronx.

 

Step by Step

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I think Luis Severino is going to pitch a good game tonight and I think the Yanks will score enough to win. Then again, I’ve been known to be wrong.

Never mind the weak sticks:

Let’s Go Yank-ees!

 

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"This ain't football. We do this every day."
--Earl Weaver